Then there are those who may be much higher up the scale at work or in their social sphere. These people can be of use in helping the narcissist get to where they want to be. They are kept on side for as long as it takes. If the narcissist has offspring then there’s going to be a Golden child in the brood somewhere. The child becomes a ‘mini me’ with exact same characteristics in particular the capacity to manipulate. The Golden child in effect out narcissises the narcissist parent withdrawing and holding to ransom if their wants or needs are not met. The Golden child is always kept on side much to the resentment of their fellow siblings. The Golden one is the only exception in that there’s nothing ‘in it’ for the narcissist with their good behaviour. This is about the closest the narcissist will ever come to being held to ransom ironically from one of their own. As for the rest of us behind every charm offensive will always lie a motive.
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If in the past, you were content with eating out at hawker centres every day, then to be extra happy (or live well), you would probably “splurge a bit more”, and perhaps eat out at a restaurant. But on the other hand, if you eat out at decent restaurants every day, then because you’re used to eating restaurant food, in order to be happy (or live well), you may splurge and eat at a Michelin Star restaurant. So while I might be happy with eating out occasionally at restaurants ; someone else might only be happy when eating out at fine dining establishments, because they see eating out as restaurants as the baseline / common. Here lies the problem then. People have different lifestyles and different baselines. There’s nothing wrong in aspiring to live well. But one has to ask – is the tradeoff worth it? Eg, what do you gain from eating at a fine dining establishment?